In this enduring series of poetic enigma...here is the 8th random piece of mind!
Is this the end of it all...without the start?
Are there no words for me...with that silence?
Do I have to try your patience...with violence
Or does it take the rains to wipe your tears away?
Describe the picture with any parallel story on this one and let me know your views...till the next cut is delivered...
March 18, 2010
Womb to Tomb...
Sometimes I defy writing any sort of philosophy in my blog but the only places I dwell is in birth, life and death...the journey. A few weeks back, the entire journey unfolded in front of my eyes and I had to pen it down...to feel better and to learn what was in store in this uncertain but certain future. So here is my take on what I believe what we are and what we end up being...
We cry, yell, groan and finally smile when we are born...mothers who see that pain as pleasure that is certainly unforgivable. We are born naked...physically, mentally and emotionally. Wrapped and polished for the world to witness another sucker! We want everything we see, we seek, we hunger and thirst for from that moment on...and no one to stop us. We seem to think that we own what hits our sights or hearts or minds...accumulation of both the tangible and intangible then becomes our next quest in life...
Seldom do we put into use what we have gathered...but collection then becomes the order of the day...now comes the crucial thinking point...what are we collecting and what is worth collecting? In India, the quest for wealth (if you are born middle class) or the quest to survive (if you are born in the Below Poverty Line) take charge of our priorities and then all the mayhem begins...societal terms and conditions apply and we then condition to think on those terms and lose our own self in all this madness...it is here where our downfall begins...mistake me not!
We gather but do we bother to give? We take but do we bother to share? All the things in life we learn...but do they teach us how to prepare for our ends to where we go and how we go? Is there something we can establish that says...when we die...we die alone with nothing in our hands except for memories and blessings with our last breath.
My grandfathers sister who stayed with us for more than a year spent her last few weeks bed-ridden...writhing in pain and waiting for her end...a religious woman herself, all she could do was to wait for her calling...and one day it came. But her last few days and her last few words taught me a lot of things in life...and it changed my perspective completely of what we are and what we must be, before we meet our maker.
I gather wealth for survival and not for splurging...I gather knowledge to share and not to hold back from the coming generation...I love music as we are born with the most rhythmic beating of the heart...I write for the world to know of what I am and will be even after when I'm gone...I will love and spread the message of peace and love to everyone around...I don't want to die a hated soul. I learn to laugh than just collecting jokes...and I will not harm or hurt anyone here on...I may have done that in my past...intentionally or unintentionally...herewith not.
I do live in remorse and regret but I have certainly made amends and reduced those heart-burns and heartbreaks and heartaches. I have confessed, apologized, admitted etc...and I feel lighter now...my soul is ready to fly for sure. But a lot needs to be done...in this materialistic society. Intrinsic joy is the current pursuit and I am doing what my heart tells me to...my mind will be my guide...but I will do as my heart tells me. It might sound cliched or corny...but who cares? it is me...my choices that determine who I am and what will I be...it is what I do than what I say or write...
Everyone of us will meet our ends...its the journey that matters that will lead us to our ends. Its a choice we all can make...there is still time, there is still hope to all those who feel defeated and done and dusted with. When I heard those last words from that dying soul...all that mattered to me was that feeling of be happy and keep others around you happy. All that I had collected or amassed turned to dust in that moment of truth...that moment call life...death rather!
I hope my rejuvenated journey will take me to my destination...there is no map...but there is a way...the road less taken...I will one day...after it is time...when all is said and done. I will take my characterful soul with me someday...that has defined me thus far...into another world...empty handed but heart filled...I hope that after I'm gone...I am remembered in good spirits...Cheers!
We cry, yell, groan and finally smile when we are born...mothers who see that pain as pleasure that is certainly unforgivable. We are born naked...physically, mentally and emotionally. Wrapped and polished for the world to witness another sucker! We want everything we see, we seek, we hunger and thirst for from that moment on...and no one to stop us. We seem to think that we own what hits our sights or hearts or minds...accumulation of both the tangible and intangible then becomes our next quest in life...
Seldom do we put into use what we have gathered...but collection then becomes the order of the day...now comes the crucial thinking point...what are we collecting and what is worth collecting? In India, the quest for wealth (if you are born middle class) or the quest to survive (if you are born in the Below Poverty Line) take charge of our priorities and then all the mayhem begins...societal terms and conditions apply and we then condition to think on those terms and lose our own self in all this madness...it is here where our downfall begins...mistake me not!
We gather but do we bother to give? We take but do we bother to share? All the things in life we learn...but do they teach us how to prepare for our ends to where we go and how we go? Is there something we can establish that says...when we die...we die alone with nothing in our hands except for memories and blessings with our last breath.
My grandfathers sister who stayed with us for more than a year spent her last few weeks bed-ridden...writhing in pain and waiting for her end...a religious woman herself, all she could do was to wait for her calling...and one day it came. But her last few days and her last few words taught me a lot of things in life...and it changed my perspective completely of what we are and what we must be, before we meet our maker.
I gather wealth for survival and not for splurging...I gather knowledge to share and not to hold back from the coming generation...I love music as we are born with the most rhythmic beating of the heart...I write for the world to know of what I am and will be even after when I'm gone...I will love and spread the message of peace and love to everyone around...I don't want to die a hated soul. I learn to laugh than just collecting jokes...and I will not harm or hurt anyone here on...I may have done that in my past...intentionally or unintentionally...herewith not.
I do live in remorse and regret but I have certainly made amends and reduced those heart-burns and heartbreaks and heartaches. I have confessed, apologized, admitted etc...and I feel lighter now...my soul is ready to fly for sure. But a lot needs to be done...in this materialistic society. Intrinsic joy is the current pursuit and I am doing what my heart tells me to...my mind will be my guide...but I will do as my heart tells me. It might sound cliched or corny...but who cares? it is me...my choices that determine who I am and what will I be...it is what I do than what I say or write...
Everyone of us will meet our ends...its the journey that matters that will lead us to our ends. Its a choice we all can make...there is still time, there is still hope to all those who feel defeated and done and dusted with. When I heard those last words from that dying soul...all that mattered to me was that feeling of be happy and keep others around you happy. All that I had collected or amassed turned to dust in that moment of truth...that moment call life...death rather!
I hope my rejuvenated journey will take me to my destination...there is no map...but there is a way...the road less taken...I will one day...after it is time...when all is said and done. I will take my characterful soul with me someday...that has defined me thus far...into another world...empty handed but heart filled...I hope that after I'm gone...I am remembered in good spirits...Cheers!
Lecture at Loyola!
There are times in ones life that disbelief and amusement go hand in hand...moreover, the fact that we are called to demonstrate in what we specialize...not knowing how good we actually are, is a good example! Such a thing dawned on me recently and it was one of those moments where I couldn't stop smiling whenever I thought about it...before the curtain raiser and after the curtain's fall...
A mundane day at the office was shaken by reality that hit me the hardest...dint pain though, got me laughing! All I hoped, that it wasn't a gag...and it wasn't! A call from an unknown number and I was apprehensive that it must be from a damned credit card ad or a ringer tune offering...it was none! This gentleman takes time to introduce himself and the purpose of the call and Im listening...I say just one thing in the entire call...Yes Sure! That's just 10% of the call and the agreement is made...a guest lecture on Creative Writing at Loyola College...audience...final year English literature students from both the bachelors and masters course!
A back-bencher, a rebel and an average studious guy, hated lectures...did it all! Ridiculed professors, cross talking, arguments, bunking, delayed submissions and of all the people, I had been invited as a guest speaker on Creative Writing! It was at that moment I believed in...This is Life! And it was happening...
Next was to prepare for the battle! Students, crowd, young guns, boo's, cynics, distractions et all! My mind was racing in all directions to decide on how to deal with this upcoming debut and it was then I decided to prepare it from a students perspective itself wrapped up with a story of my journey in writing! It was then I reminded of how theories and books dint actually help when I was in college...it still wasn't helping today's generation because we always wanted the real deal...and I was going to give it to them!
How do I dress up? Permission from Office? Announcement to friends and family? Photos and notes? What do I speak? Whom do I refer? blah blah...so may questions! Never knew speaking was so tough...but what the hell! I was to speak on my passion for creative writing...so why fear? That was how I overcame my fears and made my presentation ready!
D-Day...10th March 2010 and the hour nears and I'm all dressed up for the occasion and Boss is happy to give me permission! Friends and colleagues pour in their wishes and calls to wish me well and i set out on a hot summer day on my way to the college! Reach there just in time...damn traffic! I arrive at the scene and Im shown the way to the hall and boy...there was some crowd! A session was in progress and questions galore on journalism as a career...but my mind was elsewhere!
I meet my co-guest speaker...an accomplished poetess Sharanya Manivannan and shes prepared as well...cool as a cucumber! I'm huffing, puffing, racing heart beats...it was all about to come crashing down! The session introduction is done by the host and we are introduced by our profile sheets...mine obviously been beaten to death by Sharanya's profile! Well...not a good start but nevertheless...scope for improvement!
Sharanya delves into her area of writing passion and moments and Im all awed about her nitty gritty details and so was the crowd...dumbstruck, the crowd applauded her effort and fired a few questions which she dealt with panache and style...smooth as silk. Next on stage...yours truly!
And then it finally began...lights off and the monitor flashes with the title and the slides...I felt like a completely different person on stage than what I was off-stage and it worked! The alter ego funda worked and it was blockbuster! As it continued from slide to slide, it became a dialogue and a story telling session and I could certainly see an engrossed audience...and that pumped me even more! The entire lecture went in full flow and my only message was to inspire and pushing people to write...anything newly written is creative! Mentioned my inspirations and credited my heroes and mentors who helped me get this far...the applause followed and it was music to the ears...it was only then that i realized that it was close to 45 minutes of speaking...a bottle of water to fittingly quench my thirst!
The Q&A session was interesting and was probably the coolest part of it all! That extended to almost another 30 minutes or so and it was just pure fun to answer all sorts of questions ...from personal, tragic, fun, inspirational to instances of truth and dare etc...got a few damsel eyes staring at me as well..it had it all! All inclusive...it was a splendid moment and was worth looking back as a revelation and a turning point for me to say the least! Thanking everyone and urging all to write no matter what comes through in life...picking each moment in life but telling not the obvious...to write with the twists of thought and emotion...
I did receive a memento as a sign of thanks and it was an honor to even be on stage and tell people about my passion for writing...my creative side of life had indeed come full circle and i felt at the top of Maslow's Motivational Theory's Triangle...I'm glad I wasn't booed or thrown rotten eggs at or even criticized...I was certainly humbled by the open audience and the applause was a perfect climax.
For me, it was a 'rockstar' moment in life thus far and for those about to write...I salute you!
A mundane day at the office was shaken by reality that hit me the hardest...dint pain though, got me laughing! All I hoped, that it wasn't a gag...and it wasn't! A call from an unknown number and I was apprehensive that it must be from a damned credit card ad or a ringer tune offering...it was none! This gentleman takes time to introduce himself and the purpose of the call and Im listening...I say just one thing in the entire call...Yes Sure! That's just 10% of the call and the agreement is made...a guest lecture on Creative Writing at Loyola College...audience...final year English literature students from both the bachelors and masters course!
A back-bencher, a rebel and an average studious guy, hated lectures...did it all! Ridiculed professors, cross talking, arguments, bunking, delayed submissions and of all the people, I had been invited as a guest speaker on Creative Writing! It was at that moment I believed in...This is Life! And it was happening...
Next was to prepare for the battle! Students, crowd, young guns, boo's, cynics, distractions et all! My mind was racing in all directions to decide on how to deal with this upcoming debut and it was then I decided to prepare it from a students perspective itself wrapped up with a story of my journey in writing! It was then I reminded of how theories and books dint actually help when I was in college...it still wasn't helping today's generation because we always wanted the real deal...and I was going to give it to them!
How do I dress up? Permission from Office? Announcement to friends and family? Photos and notes? What do I speak? Whom do I refer? blah blah...so may questions! Never knew speaking was so tough...but what the hell! I was to speak on my passion for creative writing...so why fear? That was how I overcame my fears and made my presentation ready!
D-Day...10th March 2010 and the hour nears and I'm all dressed up for the occasion and Boss is happy to give me permission! Friends and colleagues pour in their wishes and calls to wish me well and i set out on a hot summer day on my way to the college! Reach there just in time...damn traffic! I arrive at the scene and Im shown the way to the hall and boy...there was some crowd! A session was in progress and questions galore on journalism as a career...but my mind was elsewhere!
I meet my co-guest speaker...an accomplished poetess Sharanya Manivannan and shes prepared as well...cool as a cucumber! I'm huffing, puffing, racing heart beats...it was all about to come crashing down! The session introduction is done by the host and we are introduced by our profile sheets...mine obviously been beaten to death by Sharanya's profile! Well...not a good start but nevertheless...scope for improvement!
Sharanya delves into her area of writing passion and moments and Im all awed about her nitty gritty details and so was the crowd...dumbstruck, the crowd applauded her effort and fired a few questions which she dealt with panache and style...smooth as silk. Next on stage...yours truly!
And then it finally began...lights off and the monitor flashes with the title and the slides...I felt like a completely different person on stage than what I was off-stage and it worked! The alter ego funda worked and it was blockbuster! As it continued from slide to slide, it became a dialogue and a story telling session and I could certainly see an engrossed audience...and that pumped me even more! The entire lecture went in full flow and my only message was to inspire and pushing people to write...anything newly written is creative! Mentioned my inspirations and credited my heroes and mentors who helped me get this far...the applause followed and it was music to the ears...it was only then that i realized that it was close to 45 minutes of speaking...a bottle of water to fittingly quench my thirst!
The Q&A session was interesting and was probably the coolest part of it all! That extended to almost another 30 minutes or so and it was just pure fun to answer all sorts of questions ...from personal, tragic, fun, inspirational to instances of truth and dare etc...got a few damsel eyes staring at me as well..it had it all! All inclusive...it was a splendid moment and was worth looking back as a revelation and a turning point for me to say the least! Thanking everyone and urging all to write no matter what comes through in life...picking each moment in life but telling not the obvious...to write with the twists of thought and emotion...
I did receive a memento as a sign of thanks and it was an honor to even be on stage and tell people about my passion for writing...my creative side of life had indeed come full circle and i felt at the top of Maslow's Motivational Theory's Triangle...I'm glad I wasn't booed or thrown rotten eggs at or even criticized...I was certainly humbled by the open audience and the applause was a perfect climax.
For me, it was a 'rockstar' moment in life thus far and for those about to write...I salute you!
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